I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
