no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize