I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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