yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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