No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
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