Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
