ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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