Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
being pregnant is like rehab
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
