What a fucking waste of an outfit
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
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