I seem to have left my pride at pride
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
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