I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
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