I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
