We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
We won't sleep together?
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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