i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
