hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
