I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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