first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
