8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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