How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
