wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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