Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
it's great music for shaving your balls
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize
