Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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