yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i wish my penis had a tongue
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Randomize
