I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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