he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
