Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
