I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
