...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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