Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
