After last night, I could never be a politician.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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