I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I didn't notice because vodka
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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