:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
