I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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