if you like me you must not know who I am
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
