Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
