How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
We have so much sex to catch up on
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Randomize