Farmville is her only friend.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize