Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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