He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
