ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Your topless pictures make me question reality
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
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