I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
