when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize