Plan B is the new Plan A
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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