Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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