So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
