what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
