you guys were way drunker than both of me
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
