Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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