That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
