That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
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