google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
